Theater:

I've never really been the theatrical type. As a kid I would get lead roles in the church musicals solely because I was classically trained, hence having a good sense of pitch and the ability to learn tunes quickly. The play director, however, never failed to mention how lacking I was in expression and acting. In high school, I knew my place was not on the stage, but rather in the pit. I realize now how my shortcomings in expressing myself permeate into my daily interactions. Sometimes I may not be as animated as I want to be so the message comes across suppressed. Other times I will just not try at all. I don't think I'm saying I need to join an actors guild to be more showy. I think I just want to say what I need to say. Shut up John Mayer.

Alien:

Titans:

Lately I've been listening to a lot of classical music. I'll turn it on in my room as I'm going to sleep or waking up. When I think about it, the approach and results are so incredibly different from most popular modern music. Usually classical music involves fifty people who have devoted their lives to the discipline of their instrument playing. Most bands today have about five people who are looking to make a sound that has yet to be discovered.

I could probably go on and on about classical pieces, but generally my analysis is pretty abstract and uninteresting. But here's something definite- pieces composed by Mozart are beast. Bach has some awesome concertos, while Beethoven rocks the symphonies. Brahms is the worst and can burn in hell.

Lunch:

I eat out a lot here, which will definitely be something I will miss at my new job. Usually, I rotate between Potbelly's, California Tortilla, The 1819 Deli, Fuddruckers, Quiznos, Subway, Dominos, a couple of Indian places, and this place that has the best BBQ beef brisket that I could possibly imagine. For months, one of my coworkers and I have been trying to find what we call "The Shwarma Cart". There's this online listing of Hilal food in the area and the reviews of this food cart listed his location a few blocks from my office, yet he was never there. This week he finally appeared, but instead right around the corner of our block! The food is awesome, especially his falafel. It's pretty much the best falafel I've ever had. I'd eat it everyday for the remaining time I have here, but I have so many free lunches lined up that I may only be able to go there a few more times. When it comes to food, I think I'm pretty spoiled right now.

Georgia:

Why do I feel the need to speak in code all of the time? I think I am far too focused on that which is minute and missing out often on the big picture.

Switchblade:

Today I intend to turn in my resignation letter to my supervisor here at Pepco. Today also marks my one year anniversary with the company. I was made an offer by BGE earlier this week which I will be accepting today as well. It certainly feels as if I've been here for longer than a year with all of the people I've gotten to known and all the projects I've acquired. When I pulled my boss aside to tell her, she knew the second I closed the door exactly what I had to say. I don't think I gave off any signs of my intentions to change jobs, but I think it was clear that it was a viable and attractive option for me. I think I'm a bit emotional about leaving, but also glad and excited. We'll see what the next couple of months hold for me.

P.S. I'm trying to get an iPhone so that I can access anything that BGE blocks eg. facebook.

Access:

Is it ridiculous that an important factor in my choice of jobs is open access to Facebook?

Skunk:

I've fallen off the blogroll for a little while, mainly because I haven't been able to put together any complete thoughts. Since my last post I've probably started writing two or three times, but just scrapped whatever I had since they were fairly incoherent.

I feel a bit more rested after taking off a weeks worth of vacation from work. This past weekend was a blast mainly because it was nice to have good friends close by, but also because it was action packed after having time to rest up. For a while I have found myself just wishing time away, as if 6 PM Friday couldn't come sooner and the weekend would hold all the self-fulfillment I could ever need. Quite clearly, this kind of attitude is flawed and weak. After a quick vacay and a sweet weekend I think the attitude has mostly dissapated. There are some nice things about not having any expectations, but it also feels good to hope for a good thing to come along every once in a while.

Highlights:

Some morning highlights:

-From home to work it took me exactly, 1 hour and 1 minute which is an all time record for me.
-I yanked a gnarly nose hair which was much longer than I could imagine a nose hair to be.
-I think I may have found some form a solution to my pant leg continuously getting caught underneath the tongue of my shoe when I walk.
-There should be donuts at this meeting I'm about to go to.

Just waiting for the weekend to roll around.

Conservation:

Whenever I've tried to explain Planet Earth to people who haven't seen it, they look at me like I'm crazy. "How could a nature documentary possibly be that interesting or cool?" It just is! If you take the time to watch a few episodes, I guarantee you'll appreciate the world we live in more.

I think watching the DVDs should count as a green iniative for companies where we'd get paid to watch them while at work.

Adults:

Growing up can be such a foreign concept.

Yesterday Usher's new album "Here I Stand" came out. Through reading the inside cover and watching some interviews on 106 and Park last night, I feel like I was able to get some insight into what he is trying to express through his music. The album, to me, seems very mature in that he's thought out his emotions, his actions, his place in life and has come to terms with who he has become. When I first picked up the CD, the label said "Soul" instead of R&B, which is a classification I sort of agree with.

I don't consider myself experienced or fully developed or all-wise. I think that's why I don't accept that I'm an adult or grown up. I wonder when I will reach that point.

Withdrawl:

This morning I was thinking about missing Chapter Camp. I hold many fond memories of those four one-week visits to Champion, and it's interesting that the timing for such nostalgia is not too far off the actual calendar. I guess I have a pretty good internal clock.

A couple of months ago I was aching for a vacation pretty bad. Things were fine at work and I wasn't burnt out, but I just felt like I needed some time off. I then realized that this year was the first year in 17 where I had no spring break. Strange. On one hand, I would think that missing spring break is not a big deal since I never capitalized on that week off to do exciting things or see people. As a matter of fact I think I often had school work that I had to catch up on during that time. On the other hand, if you do something every year for 17 years in a row, it is bound to have some significance in your life.

I think the optimist would say that now there is the opportunity to rework my internal clock and start new traditions. The sloth in me resists such a suggestion. But I suppose I can't rewind, so the only alternative is to push forward.

Burgers:

Last night I had a dream where I and some other people were sitting down at a burger restaurant. At first I think the menu resembled Five Guys' with the single burger size ordering method. Then it seemed to be more like Cheeburger Cheeburger because we were sitting down and I saw guacamole as an available condiment. When the waitress came around to get my order, I discovered that it was neither of those restauarants and I had no idea how to order a burger. At that moment I woke up, leaving me somewhat frustrated but more so confused as to why I would have such a vivid dream about that. Maybe going to a burger place for lunch will bring about some resolution.

Chlorophyll:

Lately I've been finding that I have less energy than usual. My first suspicion was that I was simply doing too much. Going out for dinner or happy hour after work plus a myriad of parties and social events on the weekend can be pretty demanding on the body and psyche. This past week and weekend I did very little (comparitively) in hopes that I would be rejuvenated, yet I don't think I feel any less tired or drained.

My next target might be to try getting more sleep. I average a decent amount, but perhaps I need more. The only way to do so is to go to bed earlier, which is a big sacrifice considering how valuable time at home with the housies is. Already that after-work window is limited and becoming disciplined to cutting it down would be a tough task.

I do believe there are alternative activities that I have yet to try that might work. Supposedly running increases general energy levels, and I definitely could use the cardio. Spending time outside just sitting or working on the garden can be refreshing. Perhaps listening to music while lying on the couch would be good. I'm open to suggestions.

Titanic:

My coworkers are having a conversation regarding Celine Dion in the cube next to me. Sometimes life can be so strange if you stop to think about it.

Emperor:

There were a lot of dark jedi on the metro today, if you get my drift.

On my commute, it's pretty easy to tell apart those who know what they are doing and those who don't travel that way normally. For some reason I find small enjoyment in showing off amidst all the tourist. Like knowing the exact timing between stops. Or completing a hard sudoku while standing and not holding on to any rails or leaning on any walls. Just having a comfortableness that says "I'm pro at this, try to stay out of my way" ... it's strangely gratifying.

Remember:

Items of nostalgia at the moment:
- Kanye West and warm weather driving
- Chick fila rituals
- Tidal basin walks

I want to take a vacation. I think it's about time to start the planning phases.

Alterations:

1. Jacket size taken down to a 36 S (R will do if they don't have it).

2. Pant inseam taken in 1.5 inches, length unhemmed .5 inches.

3. Shirt sleeve taken in 2 inches, shortened 1 inch.

4. Shirt back taken in 1 inch, lower back 1.5 inches.

5. Haircut 10 days prior to event. Hair product choice, pending.

By the third round, I should have this pretty figured out. Guys- don't bring your dates. Ladies, try not to swoon so bad.

Dancing:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NHj1Gv4HNEg

These guys are definitely going to win. They're the sickest.

Sometimes when I watch enough YouTube of people doing amazing things, I think "oh yeah, I can do that". But then reality kicks in.

Routine:

Whenever someone has recently asked me how things are going, my answer has been "routine". These past few weeks especially, I have done nothing outside of eat, watch TV, sleep, drive, and work during the week. And even going out on the weekends has become routine. While each weekend presents a different fun event, the schedule is still the same and the feelings of excitement ending in extreme fatigue are the same weekend to weekend.

Basically, all I'm saying is that I've been uncreative and unmotivated and I think it would be nice to have dinners in the District again, to take weekend trips, or to plan a spectacular cookout. You know, mix it up a little.

400:

Happy 400th post, blog. Thanks to all the supporters and commenters who have made such a feat possible. What they say is true- there really are some angels in this city.

Ticks:

The manager of my department (two levels up from my position) is a pocket change jingler. I think that speaks volumes about what kind of person he is.

Vegetables:

Yesterday I had the day off from work. I woke up with the energy and determination to make it a productive day with some laundry and actually getting out of the house to run a few errands at the mall. But soon after I hit a road block- trying to get my hair cut. The first place I went was too crowded and the other place I had looked up I couldn't find. Then I figured I could just go home and either cut it myself or walk over to Knockout cuts two blocks away. Instead my momentum fizzled out when I plopped down on the couch and turned on the TV.

I know that I actually need that time to not do anything and relax to offset the time I spend at work and the energy I spend going out to events and such. It just feels like a waste of time, and it sucks having stuff that I failed to get accomplished still hovering over my head throughout the rest of the work week.

Next week I will be changing over to the 4-10 hour work days and will be having Mondays off. I didn't want to fight with my other coworkers over getting Fridays off, and plus nobody's really doing that much work on Fridays anyway so I figured it would be best to skip out on Mondays. I hope that with my added day off I will find the motivation to use that time well.

Rather:

If you were in an arranged marriage situation...
would you rather:

have your mate be a shallow supermodel and spend time developing a deeper personality with them

or

have your mate be an interesting, but physically less attractive person... but have a lot of money for physical modifications?

you know, like if he was just like all the way there but had a little something to remind me of the good old days.

Jumbles:

I haven't taken much time recently to do much thinking. I don't think I've been able to sort out my feelings lately, nor do I think I really want to. It's probably a formula of one part numbness and one part neglection. Of course, the result is some form of self-ignorance or denial. Whenever someone asks me what I'm thinking about these days or how I am doing, I can honestly answer with, "I don't know" and just leave it at that. Soon, I'm sure, I will have some time to sort out and talk about my insides, but until then... it's kind of like having a cluttered and messy room with dirty laundry everywhere and saying "eh, whatever."

Jobbing:

I don't write that much about work on here, which I find strange since I spend so much time at work and also generate all of my posts from work. So here's a tidbit regarding work.

My supervisor is pretty awesome. While she is rather intimidating and runs a lot of people over (if you get in her way, she will destroy you with her massive intellect), if you have a good attitude then she is totally supportive. Yesterday I chaired my first customer meeting for a subdivision project. To me, customer meetings are always a bit surreal. Here I am, a lowly engineer, shaking hands with the VP of an electrical firm or the property owner of this multi-million dollar lot or an architect who's designed all sorts of buildings in DC. The fact that I am supposed to be telling these bigwigs what they need to do is daunting and seems silly.

Before the meeting my supervisor pulls me aside and tells me, "You seem to be too tentative. They are your applicant. They are asking for your help, so take more control. You know this stuff so I want you to be in charge of the situation." And then after the meeting she stops by my cube and says, "That was good in there. Good job." I truly believe that the boss can make or break the deal for any job position.

For a while I've been tinkering with the idea of going to another company. I might be able to get a pay increase (doesn't really matter) and reduce my commute to 10 minutes (would be really sweet). I know they are hiring because they've just picked up a friend of mine who just graduated and also have made offers to two of the engineers from my workplace. The main reason I haven't been hard pressed to apply is because my supervisor doesn't deserve the pains that come with hiring and training a new person and covering all the work until that person is up to speed. If I were to be moved to another section (which is entirely possible with all sorts of people leaving the department), though, I would be looking elsewhere in a heartbeat.

That's my story.