Christmas:

This'll probably be my last post from Maryland in 2006, so I'd better make it a good one. Umm, it's past my bed time so it'll also be a quick one.

I'll definitely still be connected in Houston since all of my cousins are techies.

Anyway, merry Christmas. Thank you so much for the gift you gave to me. Don't you know? Your friendship and the relationship I have with you is something that I value over any type of possession. I hope my end of the deal is also worthwhile to you.

More scattered thoughts... Some things make me happy. Snowflakes, chilling, cooking, climbing, ridiculous movies, etc. They make me really happy... but in the grand scheme of things they don't bring me joy. I was thinking of the lines 'Joyful, joyful we adore thee' and 'giver of eternal gladness' today and was hit by the fact that in order to mean those words I must acknowledge the joy that Jesus gives to me. A lot of times I don't, and I try to fill that void with happy things. I wish I didn't. So during this Christmas season I'm going to try and focus in on that.

You know, all of the pretty decorations we put up and the beautiful songs that are sung in church... I think a lot of people do it for their own enjoyment. I sometimes see that attitude as wasteful. But anyway, I am learning to see things differently- where all the majesticness of the Christmas season is to reflect the majesty of God. Yes, Jesus was born in a dirty and lowly place... but what he was to do and what he is doing is majestic worthy of our decorating/vocal/artistic talents.

When I think of majesty (please pardon me for this reference) I think of the end of the third Lord of the Rings movie with the great ceremony and an entire city bowing down to a few short hobbits. Okay, I don't know where I was going with this... so that means it's time to go to bed. Goodnight.

Surrender:

I want to surrender all.

I'm not even at the point where I yearn for Him. My desire to follow and worship are lacking. I am only at the point where I want to yearn.

Self:

bleeeeeh... Mind vomit:

I feel inadequate. On one hand, I wish they would value me on a much more intimate level. On the other, I wish I weren't so gosh darn selfish about getting attention. I'm stuck because I desire vanity- I am only self assured through others. Saying that makes me feel gross and dirty, but that's what I am and admitting it is the first step to change.

Sorry about the lack of specifics. You know what I mean.

Beau:

Pictured: Beau, October of 2004.

I first met this fine young fellow outside of the North Campus Diner on September 15th, 2003 at around 5:50 PM I think. I'm not sure who started the conversation, but we were both early to the first small group and were looking for the leaders to show.

This picture is of Beau on our small group camping trip. He was kind enough to follow me from our freshman SG into our sophomore SG.


I guess he is one of the first persons I met here at college and someone who has always been around for me. I would consider Beau to be one of my most loyal friends, and for this I am thankful.









So as the end of this semester marks the end of an era, may a new one begin. Long live the adventures of the two people whose names always get mixed up even though they sound nothing alike.

Finals:

Well it's that time of year again. We're all pulling our hair out and trying to remain as disciplined as possible. With finals starting in about 7 hours, I'm a little unsure about how I feel about the next week. Honestly there is not a ton of studying that I need to do and I'm not very worried about my classes. Also, I have the first final slot and one in the almost last slot. So when looking at the density of stress/studying over the whole time period, it's actually very low.

But still, based solely on principle, I am forcing myself to not have any fun... which doesn't make any sense. I should be working hard and playing hard, not working hard and staring off into oblivion the rest of the time. So with that in mind, please call me up to do something fun and random.

Let's see other scattered thoughts:
- I want to try more ethnic foods
- Being around couples drains me
- I need to be around people, though
- I smell bad
- I over analyze things way too much
- It's about time I start getting my priorities in order
- Traveling over break will be really fun but sort of hard to deal with emotionally

Yikes:

I just realized that that was my last IV Christmas Ball. It was a great one for sure, but I'll miss them dearly.

Break:

You only live once and you only go to college once (hopefully). That's why I'm still up. I'm currently amidst a small break in between exams and I'm allowed to blow off some steam without worrying about school. So forget sleep; let's go do something ridiculous.

Christmas:

I'm ready for Christmas to come.

Po-po:

The law hasn't been so agreeable with me lately. A cop pulled me over for cutting off my friend. It wasn't even marginally agressive... I wasn't even speeding. He didn't even give me a warning because I didn't do anything wrong.

While a bunch of us where standing in a parking lot, another cop pulls up and asks us what we're doing. He then proceeds to tell us to "keep out of trouble". I wouldn't be surprised to see that there was another shooting on Knox Road tonight in the Diamondback on Monday.

Then I got a notice today that I got caught by a red light camera in DC. I swear that that light has the shortest yellow I've ever seen. I'm certain the intersection is rigged that way... I am sooo certain.

Right now it would take a lot for law enforcement to redeem itself in my eyes.