Productivity:

Sometimes it is hard to be motivated at work--

me: haha
  
i want guacamole
5:12 PM 
Matt: i should have been a roman emperor
  
go get some
  
look at you, you're like a bag of hungryness
 
me: a sack, even
 
Matt: haha
5:13 PM 
yeah but it could be a marble sack, or a potato sack...big size difference
  
a bag is general you know around the same size
  
unless its a snack, sandwich, or lunch bag
5:14 PM 
me: there aren't very big bags though... like few reach the size of a sack
 
Matt: yes
 
me: body bag perhaps
 
Matt: true story hippos
5:15 PM 
and baseball bags
 
me: hockey bag
  
that's all i can think of
 
Matt: yeah i was squinting because i was thinking hard
 
me: for sacks, you have all kinds of produce that comes in sacks
  
peanuts too
5:16 PM 
Matt: none as big as the potato though
 
me: i don't know anyone who has a marble sack
 
Matt: i have a marble sack
  
they had marble sack in the movie major league 2 as well
5:17 PM 
me: that's just unamerican

Knobs:

Sometimes I feel like this:


A fireman arrives at the scene of a house on fire. He busts the front door down and does a quick search for anyone inside and finds that no one was home, at which point he decides to do his best to isolate the fire by moving furniture and removing air flow. When he's done all he can inside, the fireman lays out his hose and hooks it up to the nearest hydrant and prepares to fight the fire, confident that he can minimize the damage. But when he goes to turn on the water, the valve knob which should be as easy to operate as a kitchen sink faucet just won't budge. He uses whatever leverage he can find to turn it, but his attempts are useless. So, he plops down on the ground and watches the house burn...

Spaces:

As of late, I have been almost exclusively been listening to classical and country music. My ties to classical music and thoughts on it have been somewhat discussed in past posts, so you're welcome to browse through those as you please. It's nice to listen to when I go to bed because it's comparitively abstract.

I've changed my default car radio station to the local country station, which is a pretty sharp contrast to the hip hop station it used to be sitting on. Back in the day, around my sophomore year of high school, I picked up listening to country music mainly because I was intrigued by the fiddle/violin interludes. I stuck with it for a couple of years up until my sophomore year of college when my music tastes were less compatible and not so easily shared.

There are a couple of things about country music. The lyrics are simple and easy to understand, though I don't think there is necessarily any loss of meaning (one can be equally convicted whether it's through a commandment or a parable). The rhythmic meter, chorus/verse structure, and instrumental sounds are all very standard and traditional, so while the music is not very innovative it certainly can be described as comfortable. Also, it seems like it's a smaller genre where there aren't very many hits and the same songs are circulated over and over, alternated with classic hits from the past ten years.

No conclusion to be drawn from any of that. Just- when it's nice enough out to have your windows rolled down and you find some wide open roads- go ahead and try blasting some country and you'll probably feel better.

Penance:

Lessons in missing the point. I've always liked this phrase, though I don't really know what it means or where it came from. I guess the way I interpret it is that there is a lot to learn from being oblivious. Like how people are concerned with the radiation emitted by cell phones while the Sun's radiation does 100 times the damage to our bodies- some things are inescapable so why worry about it? Another train of thought that runs parallel as a lesson- motives without goals. When I can identify a motive without a goal I realize that I've probably missed the point. Example- "I work hard so that I can get a promotion. I get a promotion so that I can get paid more. I get paid more so that I can afford... What do I really need to buy again?" Or- "I spend time with this person so that I can get to know them better. I get to know them better so that we can be closer. I get closer to them so that we can form a relationship... Wait, is this someone who actually makes me happy?". Do you get the picture of this exercise?

Genome:

I stumbled upon this podcast last night:

http://blog.pandora.com/podcast/

Each episode discusses a different aspect of music and picks it apart. The guests provide musical examples for each point so that it is very easy to understand what they are talking about. It's absolutely fascinating to me, and I'd recommend it to anyone who is a music nerd. Maybe start with "Meters and Time Signatures" or "Synthesis".

Resistivity:

Carefree. That is not how I would describe myself. There is much I care about, much I mull over and often I find myself more lost than before. Somehow it doesn't seem like it should be that way.

Triforce:

I need to get into a game. A hardcore video game. I now seem to have a little more time since I work much closer to home. Other people seem more busy than I with other people, so I don't spend my time hanging out. Looks like next on my priority list is video games. And what's wrong with getting lost in a little fantasy? I think I dwell on the pains and stresses of life too much anyway.

The question becomes- what game?

Jam of the moment: Leave Out All the Rest - Linkin Park
And not because it was played during the Twilight credits, but because it is a staple to my current Pandora station project.

Temperance:

I've written about this before. I've been thinking about it recently in a different light. Temperance generally can be interpreted as the control of anger- whether it's how one regulates action when angry or perhaps just being less angry. But what about how that is affected by the tempers of the people around you? If my friend is angry about something and I get angry about it as well, we're likely to feed off of each other probably resulting in the demonizing of that subject. If my friend is angry about something and I don't feel the same way, there's more perspective that will likely balance the situation. Hence then it seems to make sense to surround myself with people who are better tempered than me in certain areas, and help others who are less tempered than I in the other areas. Completely logical. What about people who don't care to be calmed when they are angry? Is temperance really a good thing or is it just repression? And how often is it overlooked or underappreciated as a character trait?

That's all I've got on that. I can't seem to hold onto a single train of thought for more than 5 minutes these days. How sad.

Theater:

I've never really been the theatrical type. As a kid I would get lead roles in the church musicals solely because I was classically trained, hence having a good sense of pitch and the ability to learn tunes quickly. The play director, however, never failed to mention how lacking I was in expression and acting. In high school, I knew my place was not on the stage, but rather in the pit. I realize now how my shortcomings in expressing myself permeate into my daily interactions. Sometimes I may not be as animated as I want to be so the message comes across suppressed. Other times I will just not try at all. I don't think I'm saying I need to join an actors guild to be more showy. I think I just want to say what I need to say. Shut up John Mayer.

Alien:

Titans:

Lately I've been listening to a lot of classical music. I'll turn it on in my room as I'm going to sleep or waking up. When I think about it, the approach and results are so incredibly different from most popular modern music. Usually classical music involves fifty people who have devoted their lives to the discipline of their instrument playing. Most bands today have about five people who are looking to make a sound that has yet to be discovered.

I could probably go on and on about classical pieces, but generally my analysis is pretty abstract and uninteresting. But here's something definite- pieces composed by Mozart are beast. Bach has some awesome concertos, while Beethoven rocks the symphonies. Brahms is the worst and can burn in hell.

Lunch:

I eat out a lot here, which will definitely be something I will miss at my new job. Usually, I rotate between Potbelly's, California Tortilla, The 1819 Deli, Fuddruckers, Quiznos, Subway, Dominos, a couple of Indian places, and this place that has the best BBQ beef brisket that I could possibly imagine. For months, one of my coworkers and I have been trying to find what we call "The Shwarma Cart". There's this online listing of Hilal food in the area and the reviews of this food cart listed his location a few blocks from my office, yet he was never there. This week he finally appeared, but instead right around the corner of our block! The food is awesome, especially his falafel. It's pretty much the best falafel I've ever had. I'd eat it everyday for the remaining time I have here, but I have so many free lunches lined up that I may only be able to go there a few more times. When it comes to food, I think I'm pretty spoiled right now.

Georgia:

Why do I feel the need to speak in code all of the time? I think I am far too focused on that which is minute and missing out often on the big picture.

Switchblade:

Today I intend to turn in my resignation letter to my supervisor here at Pepco. Today also marks my one year anniversary with the company. I was made an offer by BGE earlier this week which I will be accepting today as well. It certainly feels as if I've been here for longer than a year with all of the people I've gotten to known and all the projects I've acquired. When I pulled my boss aside to tell her, she knew the second I closed the door exactly what I had to say. I don't think I gave off any signs of my intentions to change jobs, but I think it was clear that it was a viable and attractive option for me. I think I'm a bit emotional about leaving, but also glad and excited. We'll see what the next couple of months hold for me.

P.S. I'm trying to get an iPhone so that I can access anything that BGE blocks eg. facebook.

Access:

Is it ridiculous that an important factor in my choice of jobs is open access to Facebook?

Skunk:

I've fallen off the blogroll for a little while, mainly because I haven't been able to put together any complete thoughts. Since my last post I've probably started writing two or three times, but just scrapped whatever I had since they were fairly incoherent.

I feel a bit more rested after taking off a weeks worth of vacation from work. This past weekend was a blast mainly because it was nice to have good friends close by, but also because it was action packed after having time to rest up. For a while I have found myself just wishing time away, as if 6 PM Friday couldn't come sooner and the weekend would hold all the self-fulfillment I could ever need. Quite clearly, this kind of attitude is flawed and weak. After a quick vacay and a sweet weekend I think the attitude has mostly dissapated. There are some nice things about not having any expectations, but it also feels good to hope for a good thing to come along every once in a while.

Highlights:

Some morning highlights:

-From home to work it took me exactly, 1 hour and 1 minute which is an all time record for me.
-I yanked a gnarly nose hair which was much longer than I could imagine a nose hair to be.
-I think I may have found some form a solution to my pant leg continuously getting caught underneath the tongue of my shoe when I walk.
-There should be donuts at this meeting I'm about to go to.

Just waiting for the weekend to roll around.

Conservation:

Whenever I've tried to explain Planet Earth to people who haven't seen it, they look at me like I'm crazy. "How could a nature documentary possibly be that interesting or cool?" It just is! If you take the time to watch a few episodes, I guarantee you'll appreciate the world we live in more.

I think watching the DVDs should count as a green iniative for companies where we'd get paid to watch them while at work.

Adults:

Growing up can be such a foreign concept.

Yesterday Usher's new album "Here I Stand" came out. Through reading the inside cover and watching some interviews on 106 and Park last night, I feel like I was able to get some insight into what he is trying to express through his music. The album, to me, seems very mature in that he's thought out his emotions, his actions, his place in life and has come to terms with who he has become. When I first picked up the CD, the label said "Soul" instead of R&B, which is a classification I sort of agree with.

I don't consider myself experienced or fully developed or all-wise. I think that's why I don't accept that I'm an adult or grown up. I wonder when I will reach that point.

Withdrawl:

This morning I was thinking about missing Chapter Camp. I hold many fond memories of those four one-week visits to Champion, and it's interesting that the timing for such nostalgia is not too far off the actual calendar. I guess I have a pretty good internal clock.

A couple of months ago I was aching for a vacation pretty bad. Things were fine at work and I wasn't burnt out, but I just felt like I needed some time off. I then realized that this year was the first year in 17 where I had no spring break. Strange. On one hand, I would think that missing spring break is not a big deal since I never capitalized on that week off to do exciting things or see people. As a matter of fact I think I often had school work that I had to catch up on during that time. On the other hand, if you do something every year for 17 years in a row, it is bound to have some significance in your life.

I think the optimist would say that now there is the opportunity to rework my internal clock and start new traditions. The sloth in me resists such a suggestion. But I suppose I can't rewind, so the only alternative is to push forward.